She’s only ever been with two other men?
Is she lying? Hell, I don’t know.
But what I do know, and listen up, young buck, is that if the conversation of a woman’s number comes up, she will only count the penises that were attached to somebody she once called “boyfriend”.
Every other penis not in that category will be omitted.
She won’t count the guy she took home from the bar that one time because her cat died and she needed to be cuddled.
She won’t count any penis that she met on holiday.
She won’t count that musician she did in his friend’s car after his show.
She won’t even count the sales guy at work who she sometimes does during lunch break.
Understand? Awesome. Stay tuned for more Public Service Announcements.
The more you know … etc.
- I originally posted this on SHA, Zimbabwe’s Social Network
February 8th, 2012 at 12:49 pm
People with high numbers always suspect that people with low numbers are lying because somehow, no matter how unintentionally,any number which isn’t exactly equivalent is an accusation that you are a prude or a whore.
February 8th, 2012 at 12:50 pm
LOL so you’re saying there’s a standard BELIEVABLE figure? What is it? 10?
February 8th, 2012 at 16:23 pm
Does the number really ever matter? Surely, all you’re gon wanna know is whether or not she (OR HE, goddammit!) is carryin’ passengers, right?! A blood test, should suffice, no? Otherwise, seriously, what difference does it make? So long as the loving, inside and/or outside the bed is good, right?!
February 8th, 2012 at 22:50 pm
the number of dicks that have pounded her is as pertinent to him as what he does for a living is to her …
at base, a woman’s fanny and her womb are her currency (only in her prime though, after 25 noone cares) just as a man’s ‘means’ are his … currency markets are insanely sensitive to perception and speculation – hence the bullshitery from young girls and men trying to get laid.
it is what it is …
im a liberal fucker, but fuck, i cant say it doesnt bother me if her body count is higher than Freddy Krueger.
February 9th, 2012 at 12:25 pm
Yes, Tara, it matters. Seriously. You don’t want to buy a car with 100,000km on the clock, do you? LOL
February 12th, 2012 at 10:50 am
well that depends if its a classic chevy or mustang…i always think men worry because they are afraid she knows a thing or two more than them. Nothing like a lady giving you instructions in the bedroom like she done it 100 times before to put the spark out in the sack
February 12th, 2012 at 10:52 am
oh and so far i have found acceptable number is a quarter or less of whatever his official number is
February 13th, 2012 at 09:42 am
nah, we just dont wanna ride the rickety village bicycle with slipping gears, creaky wheels and worn saddle.
February 13th, 2012 at 09:50 am
Exactly.
February 13th, 2012 at 16:25 pm
Again, what difference does it make if the loving is good? (RE: Milage). I love it, men wanna think they special, being the only one and shit. One of a few, at the very least. Fucking hylarity at it’s best (worst? I dunno.)!
Seriously, how did women end up in this position? Of always being the bad guy.
February 14th, 2012 at 09:16 am
The difference? It doesn’t feel good knowing you’re on a ride that half the other boys in town have been on.
That’s the difference.
February 14th, 2012 at 13:50 pm
pretty young girls know this – thats why they lie about their bodycount,
grown women don’t care about their bodycount – but then again noone cares …