How to marry your Zimbabwean girlfriend

Cash money, baby! Lobola rules.

18 Replies to “How to marry your Zimbabwean girlfriend”

  1. apparently in some parts of SA it’s even worse, they can ask for the cash equivalent of 20 cattle just as vhura muromo. Then they want multiple ceremonies after that. Ini, just give me the money and I will go on an expensive holiday around the world and put a downpayment on a house. Give cows to an uncle who has never given me 2c to buy ma funnies(I hated the pink ones with a burning passion totally out of proportion to their taste). That is not happening.

  2. I don’t know which is worse for the woman, bride-price, or european dowry. I figure it’s win-win for the man side.

    Holy shitsnax! Ma funnies? Aren’t they like skittles? I’ma chocolate kinda girl, myself. But, shit, just the mention of them takes me back.

  3. Point is, neither ‘unmarried and aloness’ nor ‘married and longterm relationship’ are mutually exclusive. Shit, you can be very married and lonely as hell!

  4. oh sweet tara! im picking up what u putting down honey 🙂

    wot the feisty lass sed – aloneness has sweet fuckall to do with being in a relationship.

    u marry her coz u dont wanna be alone and she marries u coz she needs a good retirement plan and the one she really wants to be with (the one who really breaks her back) cant provide one. a sad business all round.

  5. Answer me this: Wouldn’t you like to know that your other half has stuck it out with you all this time, when they could have easily bailed? Unlike with marrige, when you would never really know? Maybe they just couldn’t be bothered with all that beauracracy.

    On the flipside, wouldn’t you want to know that your other half has enough faith in each other’s ‘love’ that they don’t the need to make it legal to feel secure?

    Mos Native, you pay me a compliment, and disrespect me and my sistas in the same post. WTF?! Really not appreciating this persistent stance on us that marrige, for us, is about security. It’s getting old, man.

  6. @tara – im not dissing, just observin n shit …

    i would love for all women to be off that security dick, i really would, coz it means me and my fellowmen dont have to be slave bitches under the guise of ‘being the man’ or provider or whatever… but, truth is, this security game has been running forever, smart women started it and men with small dicks keep it alive.

    im jussayin, i meet a shitload of pretty women and when they’re “getting to know me” and rating my eligibility as a mate, i.e. whether to shag me or shag me again and again and pop out cute little Mos’s, they’re more interested in how i get my green than in my reading list … and im talking pretty women.

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