As classics go

So I’ve borne witness to many clangers and howlers in my recent past, but as blonde moments go, this one takes some beating. So during the Spain vs Ukraine game, my white blonde female roommate asks me in all earnestness : ‘Why isn’t Beckham playing for Spain?’

As reactions go, my brain just went into meltdown. I counted to ten in my head, bit my tongue hard, and beat down with a large stick the sarcastic vitriol that was threatening to spew forth. And boy, did that take some doing! I’m still sweating from the exertion and seeing stars from the strain.

Granted I may not be getting any calls from the BBC to do live commentary any time in the near future, nor do I know any more than a few rudimentary basics about the beautiful game (as evidenced by Joe correcting my penalty/handball misconception) but Beckham play for Spain!?!

Would it not help if he were actually Spanish. Please, he’s enough of a retard in English, why complicate issues further by introducing the foreign language component. Only pretty white girls can get away with such statements. Coz the rest of us would just be laughed out of town to pursue our village idiocy elsewhere.

(Joe, as for my not writing. I unfortunately now have a job that actually requires me to do more than surf the net all day.hint. hint. Maaan, how life sucks!)