Dear Facebook Friend

First off, let me thank you very much for tagging me in your photo.

Small thing, though – I’m not in that fecking photo. I don’t actually see my face anywhere in that photo of your baby, your new car or your motherfecking lunch.

Tagging me in your flyer won’t make me come to your event. In fact, tagging me in your flyer will piss me off so much, I probably won’t come to your goddamn event because you tagged me in the fecking flyer.

I don’t care why you tagged me in your photo. It really doesn’t matter, at all.

What matters is that I’m not in your fecking photo, so please don’t tag me in your photo. Ever.

P.S. I love you.

For now.