My poor Liverpool

The current squad aside, Liverpool has always been a big team.

Ask anyone out of Manchester, London or Milan … if there’s one club for the big occasion it’s Liverpool.

Against the ‘small’ teams? Not so much.

I can’t begin to fathom the reasons for this. I just get pissed off watching our former players now playing in Spain, particularly in midfield.

The range of passing Javier Mascherano displayed on the weekend against Malaga was unbelievable. He’s got all the moves now, pinging it sixty metres from deep, playing the short one-twos; how did we lose a player like that? Barcelona, eh? Oh.

And Xabi Alonso. Oh Xabi, the transfer which saw us fall from glory like a drunken slut on 6-inch heels on a sinking cruise-liner in a hurricane. Where did he go? Madrid.

I see a pattern. And what do we have left? Steven Gerrard, who I believe we should have sold when Chelsea came calling four seasons ago. Oh, there’s also Lucas and a couple of children. Yeah, with a midfield like that, no shocks that we aren’t winning anything.

And don’t get me started on the ‘strikers’. Andy Carroll joined MySpace last weekend; he tried to join Twitter but he missed. Seriously though, this team is one of the worst I’ve seen in years, and something drastic needs to happen. What? I don’t know.

I just know it begins with regime change, and not on the bench as is usual. I mean on the field … its time to put some legends to pasture, and start anew with fresh faces.

And by fresh I don’t mean Jonjo fecking Shelvey.