Just thought I’d send out a big FUCK YOU to our nation’s retailers – Spar, OK & Bon Marche, TM and the myriad of smaller fish swimming in the murky waters of retail sales.
The reluctance of you bastards, to a one, to introduce coin change in your stores really gets on my tits.
Apparently, they’ve been offered coins by the banks, yet they refuse to take them. And we all know why, don’t we?
Cos your change is good for a little something more off the shelf. If you’re not getting a “credit note”, which is just a fucking receipt with a change amount and a signature or stamp on the back, you’re buying something more.
Dudes, I should have gone into lollipops a long time ago.
Seriously, the people selling suckers are making a fucking killing. You’ve got lollies, matches, dandy chewing gum, chocolate all conveniently located next to the till, sometimes in jars sitting right on grocery alley!
NO, I DON’T WANT A FUCKING LOLLIPOP! I WANT MY CHANGE!
Do I want a credit note? Fuck no, I’m not coming back here anytime soon, and my wallet it packed with useless shit anyways, considering every fucker in town has a business card nowadays (that’s for another day).
I just want my cash, dickwad. Is that too much to ask?
One of these days I’m gonna lead a mini-revolt in a supermarket, trash that fucker, and kidnap the manager.
All for 41 cents or something stupid like that.
Cos you ain’t keeping MY goddamn change.