I’ll start by saying I love what you do. I love the concept, the idea, the whole she-bang (yes, I just did that).
And so I watched your “jailhouse video” the other day.
I strongly believe in personal freedom, civil liberties and free will. I believe an adult is free to use their body in any way they feel like.
I even strongly support the decriminalisation, regulation and subsequent taxation of recreational drug use and prostitution. So a little stripping and sexy dancing is alright with me.
I just have one small issue to discuss. Do you have a retirement plan?
You’re a pioneer, Bev. You’re the trailblazer, the maverick, the firestarter. That is awesome. You are to erotic dance what Edgar Langeveldt is to standup comedy. You, Bev, are the Godmother.
But what’s gonna happen when the hot girls follow your lead and get in the game? When the actual, sexy, pretty young things start stripping? It will all be over, Bev.
Like I said, I love what you do, but let’s be honest, dearie … you’re not hot enough. Your act isn’t sexy. It’s awkward. It’s like listening to me playing the guitar. It’s painful. You can’t look away, but your inner child is soiling himself in shared humiliation.
So thank you for all you’ve contributed towards the liberalisation of the archaic Zimbabwean mindset.
But let’s be honest … you can’t pull this off.