No sex in the champagne room

Guy throws himself a birthday party. Guy invites friends. Friends bring their girlfriends. Guy instructs caretaker not to allow anyone in the house during party.

Around 0100hrs, two friends decide to have a four-some in one of the bedrooms. Guy, probably drunk now, arms himself with a (mother-fecking) Uzi and storms said bedroom, cornering one of his mates and shooting him in the head. Other friend, with girlfriends, flees for his life.

Police arrive around 0230hrs, guy puts Uzi in mouth and blows self away. Sound far-fetched? It happened in Norton.

Sources say when Steven Mapupu (55), the proprietor of Provisions Nightclub in Norton, realised that his friends were being intimate in his house, he armed himself with an Uzi sub-machine gun and went to investigate.

Guy’s 55 years old, which is an achievement in itself. Begs the question though; if he’s 55, how old are his friends? Cos if they’re having a fecking four-some, I guess Morpheus gave them the blue pill.

Muronda and the two girlfriends ran for dear life and managed to escape before Mapupu cornered Chinyowa and fatally shot him.

Now, I am a man of the world, and have on occasion either utilised or provided a venue, but since my life I’ve never heard of someone being killed for fecking in his mate’s house.

What a tragedy.

9 Replies to “No sex in the champagne room”

  1. What? It wouldn’t phase you if people were doing their business in YOUR bed, especially with you not in it? Especially when you gone to the trouble of trying to prevent that from happening? I reckon you’d’ve gone ballistic.

  2. I wouldn’t have believed it if I had read it anywhere else but here. SHOOT (pun intended) that’s hectic!!Me thinks we need some gun control or some bullet control which ever.

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