So you’re telling me Liverpool just sold Fernando “I love this club” Torres to Chelsea for 50 million pounds? Okay.
And then we bought Andy Fucking Carroll from Newcastle for … wait for it … really … 35 million pounds?
I mean, thirty-five million fucking squid, for Andy Carroll?
Seventy-two minutes into his England career Andrew Thomas Carroll is a £35m striker who now walks the path of Ian Rush, Robbie Fowler, Michael Owen and Kenny Dalglish, who broke the British transfer record for him to soften the blow of losing Fernando Torres for £50m to Chelsea.
I understand the sale of Torres left us suddenly cash rich and time poor, but I can’t for my life see how Carroll can justify that record fee, save from frightening the socks off opposition defenders.
Carroll has no business being on this all-time aristocratic list but the politics of the Torres deal acted as a windfall for Newcastle, who are now smiling all the way to the Championship team sheets to buy a whole new team seek out hidden talent.
What’s the world coming to?