Ten fucking zeros?

Making money make cents

Get your maths right, people. Governor Gideon Gono (aka GGG) has slashed TEN zeros from the Zimbabwean currency (in addition to the the three he removed last time0.

Now, you’d think this would be done in multiples of three. That would make accounting sense, wouldn’t it? COMMON sense, really. You do your maths in grades of threes, from thousands, millions and so forth.

But not our Reserve Bank, no. In a collosal effort to confuse an entire nation (not forgetting an entire planet of bemused onlookers) they remove TEN.

So, in essence, your 100,000,000,000.00 (a hundred billion) becomes ten dollars. A trillion becomes (let’s see, one, two …) 100 bucks, so to have a thousand Zimbabwe dollars you need ten trillion right now.

Wow. You couldn’t make it up.

21 Replies to “Ten fucking zeros?”

  1. If I was there right now, I’d take advantage of people’s confusion right now. Go do a big shop and if you’re lucky, the cashier will fuck up and charge you ten times (or 100) less. SWEET!

  2. Tara the things you optimistic about…. So JB can you use old coins. Remember I had a big collection of coins in Avondale is it still there?

  3. Eish, me ek se I don’t know about coins yet. I bet there’s some seriously confused shopkeepers out there. Guess they have to get “direction” from the monetary authorities on how to actually do this shit.

    It’s amazing I tell you. I can see ppl logged into their internet banking accounts, trying to figure out how much money they “have” now.

  4. The old coins are coming back – “The range of new currency would be $500, $100, $20, $10, $5, $2, $1 and the old coins would be brought back 50c, 25c, 20c, 10c since they were “never demonetarised”. The currency will exist together with the bearers cheques, which will expire on December 31.”

    So JB pls keep my coins boy!!

  5. I know that the aim of all this is to make things easier. But, I can only see this going to shit. I don’t know the first thing about economics, but I am pretty sure that Zim is being plunged further into the financial shithole that it is stuck in. If some one was hoarding a batch of coins, like Andy Tee, that means that they have metaphorically had their worthless money touched by Midas. Surely that is a disaster for the economy. I’d start from scratch with a new currency all together. Any takers for the name? Something more african sounding than dollar. 🙂

    AT, you still optimistic for the motherland?

  6. utterly insane. Please are there any economics majors around who can help explain how taking off zeros does anything to reduce inflation?

    These guys need to stop printing money. I know that the taking another stable currency like the rand or dare I say the USD would be seen as losing soveriegnty but in truth, it is the only way forward I can see to halt the inflationary process. Give goods a stable price and force the economy to deal with it.

    optimism must be some supercat with 99 lives if it ain’t dead yet.
    (I just wanted to write supercat)

  7. Well Tara you see why I was optimistic… my coins are worth something now. It seems the 5c and the 1c copper coin aint coming back tho… thats saddish.

  8. Imagine how relieved other African countries are that they never went for a Euro type umbrella currency for the region. That would have been hilarious. One country bringing down the region to its economic knees.

    Alias, does make you wish you produced money for a living though don’t it. .

  9. well this by no means makes life any easier; it’s jus stretched confusion even more. people are already trading in usd and rand, they might as well make it official. honestly.

  10. OR, the barter we learnt about in social studies doesn’t sound like a bad idea right now. Nothing to get confused over. Just start from SCRATCH. Take it 2 hundred years back and see where things go. Who knows things could work really well. Bob’d definitely rid himself of the multinationals. Zimbabwe becoming self sufficient. And what country would then insist on claiming back that fuck off debt Zimbabwe has. Just thinking about it has me very excited. I think it is ingenious.

    NB: I know it is flawed, but Zimbos need a break. All the currency malarkey is now taking the piss.

  11. So what is the time frame for the zeros coming back ‘new and improved’? Coz wasn’t it like Aug 2006 when they first went from ‘zero to hero’ or however the jingle went.

  12. Just counted my coins – 3.2 trillion old money 320 dollars new. Not bad that’s a few beers at OH tonight.

    He had no choice, no german paper, no new money – except the stuff that he printed yonks ago. He has brought in new coins which are so much easier to make and is betting on the talks to give a solution which the Fishmongers will back. If that happens then there will be no need to replace the money in two months. If it doesn’t then he’s screwed.

    For those of you perceptive ones, you would have noted that the highest denomination is the $500 which 2.5 times the current maximum withdrawal limit. Governor hedging his bets?

  13. THE Reserve Bank of Zimbabwe has donated a fleet of new vehicles, generators, sets of televisions, and full sets of satellite dishes for the sitting judges to improve their conditions of service

Comments are closed.