The Catpiss Conundrum

I have no running water at my house.

In fact, in the nearly five years I’ve lived in Greystone Park, I have not had running water for more than a month. In total. Consequently, my laundry is often done in the Avenues.

So I have this pair of sneakers, which I wore on the weekend in Rainy Muddy Harare, so they needed a wash. So I put them in the laundry.

After spending the day out in Cloudy Overcast Harare, my sneakers weren’t dry yet, so they were put on the balcony, four storeys up.

And now … my left shoe smells like pee.

How did my left shoe get to smell like pee, you ask? I have no fecking clue how, is my answer.

Did the maid pee in my left shoe? Though entirely possible, I don’t see a reason why she would, as I hear she’s been paid and fed quite well.

Someone else thinks a cat had its way with my trainer. While also entirely possible, this would have to be the most nimble, most ambitious motherfecker in the history of cat-dom.

To climb four floors up an outer wall just to piss in my left shoe? It would also be the most unnecessarily malicious cat in history!

It can’t be rain-water making my shoe smell bad. Because, firstly, water may make it smell bad but not like pee. Secondly, both shoes were on the balcony, so why isn’t the right one similarly afflicted with this malodorous misfortune?

Maybe I should just let it go. Let the mystery go unsolved.

But … how? I mean …

… how?