Being here in the land of the rising sun, its not often that I get to bring out my size 9 dancing shoes. So anywyay, I went to a party a couple of weeks back where I met a white guy. Never having partaken of the fruits of the lighter skinned brothers I must admit I was keen.
1. Clothes no matter how wonderful they are, do not have powers of locomotion. They will NOT pick themselves up off the floor. Underwear with skid marks is a definite NO-NO. Mate, Softex is there for a reason.
So I’ve borne witness to many clangers and howlers in my recent past, but as blonde moments go, this one takes some beating. So during the Spain vs Ukraine game, my white blonde female roommate asks me in all earnestness : ‘Why isn’t Beckham playing for Spain?’
Not only am I coming back as white, I’ve narrowed down the specifications to being blonde as well. As if further evidence was needed of…
So in my next life, I need to come back as a white woman.
So I went clubbing Saturday night, to be more accurate I went to a club and spent like 9tenths of the night sitting down. I knew there was a reason that those dancing shoes had been retired from active public service.
It’s been a while, my first world computer seems unwilling to host third world websites.
…and this is no reference to what’s been happening in the sack either. Or not been happening in all honesty.
From my observations in the recent past of my male peers, it seems to me that a lot of them are in need of some reeducation on the point of the female psyche.
In my not so numerous dealings with black men, a phenomenon manifests itself inevitably, when within a few short minutes of meeting them, they utter the words ‘I love you’. Now if you want me to break out in hives, and run screaming into the hills, this is probably the best way to do it.
An acquaintance of mine had a party this weekend. So a sister decided to invest in some glad rags and bring the dancing shoes out of their forced retirement.
The satisfaction I derive from my job can only be compared to committing suicide by gouging myself repeatedly with a rusty and blunt nail.